As one year ends and another begins, many of us will make New Year’s resolutions for health, hobbies, or career changes. But what about resolutions for your marriage? Do you have a clear vision for your marriage’s future, or how you might add value to the relationship?
Proverbs 29:18 warns, "Where there is no vision, the people perish." In our premarital coaching, we facilitate a“Dream Marriage” exercise where we ask couples to individually, but comprehensively, define their ideal marriage vision. We remind them to consider all aspects of their relationship like communication, affection, finances, conflict resolution, trust, intimacy, parenting, roles, spirituality, etc.
For example, when it comes to communication in marriage, couples might aspire to discuss things calmly, respect differing viewpoints, attentively listen without reacting, never belittle or shame, and dedicate uninterrupted moments to each other daily to connect and refuel.
Once both partners have written down their thoughts, we regroup to review each other’s contributions, discuss any similarities and differences, and then create a unified vision for their marriage.
Here’s the catch… We all bring expectations into our marriage, some realistic, others not so much. We help balance these with our couples, not discouraging dreams, but channeling them toward a future both partners can realistically and excitedly work to achieve—a fulfilling, God-centered relationship.
Maybe you've never thought about defining your marriage vision. Unwritten visions are like arrows shot in the dark—you’re unlikely to hit a target you can't see. Without a shared vision, we run the risk of losing direction and even stumbling, reminiscent of Luke 6:39: “One blind man cannot lead another one; if he does, both will fall into a ditch.”
So, what do you want for your marriage in 2024 and beyond? Your marital goals might include pursuing each other daily, having open communication, praying together, or forgiving quickly. The crucial step is to write down these wishes and make them part of your prayer regimen.This exercise offers clarity, motivates action, and tracks progress, fueling your shared journey.
So here's to growing together toward a faith-filled, supportive, and thriving marriage—God's beautiful blueprint for every couple.